Recently i had another friend from high school pass away, as i sprawl on the floor listening to my headphones with my brother behind me on the couch i am reminded how delicate life really is. You'll know why its important that my brother is behind me later. Many occasions we are reminded of the proverbial saying "tomorrow is not promised", but i get a funny bone feeling in my gut when i hear those words, I indeed embody that saying if that is humanly possible. I have had 5 H.S. classmates die (i believe) since i graduated a mere six years ago. My heart rumbles whenever i get the news and without reservation I am immediately struck by the power of God.
See, for those that are formerly unaware I was stabbed in the heart, 2 years after graduating from H.S. I additionally was wounded with a slightly collapsed lung as well. The approximate 30 mins that i lay on the ground have the strongest replay value in my mind even through this day. As a relatively young man it is hard to assess the plenary value of that proverbial phrase, although you mentally understand what is said. Experience is the best teacher. If you want to put your current situation in perspective think about your past, if time is an issue think about when you were 7 and 22 seemed like light years away. You made it and now you don't know where the time went. Think about how smart you thought you were at the age of 16, and think about how smart you are now. So for me i think about those critical minutes when i laid upon the legs of my brother and grasped at consciousness over and over, however was barely able to hold what i reached for (my body shakes even now). Consciousness was handed to me only by my brother who rattled my shoulder consistently and implored that i open my eyes. Nonetheless as i drifted in and out the events of my childhood and past replayed in my head so vividly as if i had watched myself grow up (YES, that really does happen!). As I peacefully accepted the reality that i was on the cusp of death, I was reminded in the form of my little brother to "Live". This is not a commonly shared experience but for me i think about how alive i thought i was then and compare it to how alive i am now. Have you ever felt life? I have and it feels amazing, especially the first time my two brothers came to the hospital and cautiously entered the Intensive Care Unit with blatant trepidation where i was battling, and with no words said, each one of us cried as we were overwhelmed with the feeling of LIFE.
Everyone has a purpose and you can rest assure that you are not leaving here until your purpose is fulfilled. Some may think that i am too young to do life reflections but Brian Wallington has a long road behind him.
The people we may know that pass away are our "little brothers" that remind us to live. We all know the delicacy of life but as we lay on the ground and go through the motions sometimes we need someone to rattle us and say "open your eyes, and live".
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4 comments:
I am ready to cry. I remember that day so vividly. Very powerful. You inspire me Brian. I am going to write something in a momemnt.
Wallo For President 2016
B, you already know how I feel. I remember when I got the news in Atlanta I collapsed because it hit me so hard. All I can say is that i love you and always have and always will. You are blessed with a story to tell.
I liked this post. I feel you on this. Losing people is hard but you nor them know what there purpose is in life. It could be as little as giving someone hope that they could have children, teaching some one thier ABc's to being the first in your family to graduate high school or college.
I have yet to understand why people think that having money and people knowing who you are is always peoples purpose. Honestly some of those people who have it are living out someone elses purpose because it fell in thier lap once the person who was supposed to do it di not.
I've always been happy to just have th purpose of waking up in the morning.
God bless you and your friends in this trying time.
I remember J & I blazing down I-75 to get to the hospital. I couldn't say a word, could barely breathe because if I exhaled, I felt the air would empty until I collasped. I finally collapsed in the arms of your "twin" when she said, "He's alright." God is amazing to allow you to live thru that experience, then inspire others. I love you with all that my heart can bear - AuntieAmy
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